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19-09-23 1:39am
angry but still full of love

i'm trying to talk about things other than being in love but it's so hard not to want to shout it from the top of a mountain all of the time. i understand now why people write songs and poems and all that stuff about this, i get it now, it's either that or screaming until your voice gives out. ohhhhh my god. okay. i finished my song. check it out, or don't, but actually please do, and if you DO - please also let me know somehow. umm. i wear glasses now. i thought i would hate it but i actually kind of like how they look on me. even if i do look like a nerd, it's okay, i'll own it, it's not a bad thing! no more blurry sleepwalking through life, everything has clear sharp edges now and the world is in HD. here are some things that i'm currently looking forward to: school starting, absolution (by muse my favorite baaaannndddd) 20th anniversary remastered version, hatsune miku dlc for the rhythm game i like, starting an rp stardew farm with my boooyfriiiend, weather getting colder so i get to wear my epic cold weather clothes again, and the gym pool not being under freaking maintenance anymore so i can continue my swimming. that's all.

i'm realizing that there is maybe some pent up anger inside of me but i'm not sure what to do about it. i guess i'll just let time do its thing. not that i'll forget and forgive, but just that maybe with time they will get what they deserve. just kidding. no i'm not. i'm a bitter person. i would for sure come back as a vengeful spirit and haunt this world. i'll continue holding onto my grudges until the end of time. it's okay. i'm happy, the past is the past, i'm happy and i hope that everyone that has ever wronged me burns in hell forever. i took midnight to the vet a couple of days ago and he said that her fur is one of the softest and healthiest he's ever seen. i haven't told her this yet so it doesn't go to her head. i'm so lucky that i get to bury my face in her soft fur whenever i want. i love my cat and i love my family and i love my boyfriend and i love food and i love video games and i love turning off my computer and i love laying in my bed and closing my eyes and falling asleep and entering the dream world. right now. i'm about to do that right now. bye bye.